weathered wood, birds and bones

And I may be upset that I wrote this out in public later but I fucking hate this situation of having to look and match fucking inorganically because I have never been in love and I would like to know what it feels like with someone who at least knows how to spend time on a mountain and hopefully how to read a goddamn book. And I am happier without the bother of mediocre dating and sex because my life and friends and other fulfillments are awesome but I would like to know what that seemingly unattainable connection is like.